Nightmare on Net St.
By smbea <firstname.lastname@example.org>
October has been one really eventful month. I've learned a lot of things. And I mean a LOT.
Let me count 'em.
One. Always, ALWAYS! back up your hard drive. You just never know when it will crash. Mine did and the result was my not being able to get on the Internet for TWO WEEKS! It was like having a real person die, I tell you. You'll feel so depressed, always on the verge of tears and wondering why, oh why, did it happen. Why?!?!?! You won't be wondering why in the world why you'd feel that way if you were in my shoes! Why, everything I have is on that little thing we call a hard drive. Don't believe me? They say experience is the best teacher….
Two. Always update your anti-virus data file. Getting on the Internet with an old anti-virus scanner is like having unprotected sex! (Sorry for the comparison. Just wanted to drive home a point.) Once you're online, you're a potential victim to thousands of viruses out there. You know how many viruses are out there? Thousands of them! And every month or so, anti-virus software companies have to come out with new data files you can update your anti-virus software with. It's like AIDS, you know…you won't know the virus has already gotten into your hard drive and already doing a fine time of infecting your important files. I know it's funny to watch your anti-virus scanner grab a graphical representation of a virus it detected and then see it squeeze it to death, but I'll be darned if I'll watch that right on MY computer screen! Once was enough.
Three. Save, save, save! How many times has it that I've written and typed pages and pages and thousands and thousands of words, only to have them disintegrate before my eyes because I neglected to save it? Blaming NAPOCOR or Meralco has always been useless. Only thing they know is to cut the power off when you least expect it. Blaming the next person who happened to trip on the power cord is useless. Saving is the key. CTRL-S…CTRL-S…CTRL-S… chant it until you've got it into your head. Since starting this article, I might have clicked that save button 15 or 20 times already. Better to keep clicking than not clicking at all. Hmm, you'd think a new kind of compulsive obsessive tendency is about to be developed…
Four. Download your e-mails at least once every two days. Even if you're working far from home, you still have access to your e-mails. You just change the SMTP info on your e-mail client and you'll be able to receive e-mails sent to your home e-mail address at work. When I got home a couple of weeks ago after being away for two weeks (I wanted time away from my computer that crashed. It's really hard to be in the same room with your computer and not being able to use it to get on the Internet, you know!), I almost killed my e-mail client (figuratively speaking, of course!). My two-week absence resulted to almost an hour of downloading just my e-mails! Don't ask how many e-mails I got. It's enough to make me wish that I get snail mails instead!
Five. Delete useless files in your computer. Garbage has a way to accumulate. So do useless files and cookies and programs. They slow down your computer and waste hard drive space. If you're not careful, you might run out of memory and disk space and you're in for a crash. Yesterday I was only up to less than a hundred megs of hard drive space. No wonder my computer's slow. My hard drive has been screaming for air and space for a long time already and I only got around to giving him that yesterday. A click here and there, delete here and there, and now I'm up to about 350 megs. Not super fast, but faster than it was before.
Now, with an abundance of megabytes in my hard drive, what am I going to do with it? Download other programs…fill it with games…download midis…
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